Having a random hookup so left but love u
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
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