Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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