I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
