well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
