I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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