So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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