shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
