Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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