Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
