She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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