not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
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