Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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