We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
she looked like the before picture.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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