he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
