i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
