am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Randomize
