Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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