Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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