I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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