Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
