Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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