did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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