I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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