do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
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