my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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