Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
