need another drink. this is the easiest way
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
