I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
