That's intense
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
