I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
