HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
