What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
