from now on my penis is your penis
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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