My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
then he tried to convert me to islam
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
