I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
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