sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Randomize