I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
