Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
