i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I am naked and annoyed.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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