You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
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