I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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