Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
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