Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
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i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
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Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
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