Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
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