You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
don't judge my taste in strippers
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
