She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize