I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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