'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
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