dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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