I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
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