she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
